4 Causes of marital conflicts you should avoid

3 min


Marriage is a special blessing from God and the eye of the LORD is over it. Everything special to God becomes Satan’s special object of attack. He hates it when God’s people are living in peace and harmony especially couples.

Therefore marital conflicts become his(Satan) study and makes sure marriages dishonor and grief God instead of pleasing Him. When God’s people have knowledge of what brings conflict into their marriages they will go before God to give them strength to honor Him in their marriages. Following are 4 causes of marital problems/conflicts.

1) Pride: pride is the opposite of humility. God resist the proud. The Bible Says God hates pride but gives more grace to the humble. When there’s no humility on both sides in the marriage it brings great problem. None would like to admit of some wrong thing done or ask for forgiveness from his partner. Both want to have their own way and no humility. This behavior causes problem in the marriage and doesn’t bring happiness unless the couple see their error and ask God for strength to overcome this enemy of Marriage: pride.

2)Ungratefulness: A wife or husband would do everything he/she could to please his/her partner but will be to no avail because he/she is not appreciated. She would prepare food but it’ll receive unpleasant comments. All her strength is worn out in household duties but she’s not recognized by her husband and does not receive any good compliments. This gives Satan chance to put his throne in your marriage because this bad attitude is opposite to the fruit of the Holy Spirit(“Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, 5:23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.”) so God cannot reside in the marriage but the enemy of souls.

3)Spiritual weakness: couples who don’t pray open doors to Satan to take over. “1 Thessalonians 5:17 Pray without ceasing.” The prayerful couple build strong anchor and their Creator becomes their shield in all trials. Couples who don’t make God their first and last in all things are not having peace in their marriage because no one can serve two masters. It’s either we’re with God or with the devil. Matthew 6:24.

In the daily life you will meet with sudden surprises, disappointments, and temptations. What saith the word? “Resist the devil,” by firm reliance upon God, “and he will flee from you. Draw nigh to God, and He will draw nigh to you.” “Let him take hold of My strength, that he may make peace with Me; and he shall make peace with Me.” Look unto Jesus at all times and in all places, offering a silent prayer from a sincere heart that you may know how to do His will. Then when the enemy comes in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord will lift up a standard for you against the enemy.When you are almost ready to yield, to lose patience and self-control, to be hard and denunciatory, to find fault and accuse—this is the time for you to send to heaven the prayer, “Help me, O God, to resist temptation, to put all bitterness and wrath and evilspeaking out of my heart. Give me Thy meekness, Thy lowliness, Thy long-suffering, and Thy love. Leave me not to dishonor my Redeemer, to misinterpret the words and motives of my wife, my children, and my brethren and sisters in the faith. Help me that I may be kind, pitiful, tenderhearted, forgiving. Help me to be a real house-band in my home and to represent the character of Christ to others.”12

4)Immoral affair/Adultery: Adultery in marriages is one of the deadliest threats to marriage. It destroys marriage and trust. When you made a vow before God and men to only love your partner, you thought it’s something not relevant. This vow is very special to God because God hates unfaithfulness in marriage. The vow is a barrier God creates to protect you from the devil but if you break this wall you give way for the devil to come in and destroy. Unfaithfulness in marriage doesn’t bring any peace but stern conflict. It breaks trust(something which is very difficult to restore without the help of God). Without the eye being single to God’s Glory there can’t be peace in the marriage. “1 Thessalonians 4:3 For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: 4:4 That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour; 4:5 Not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the Gentiles which know not God: 4:6 That no man go beyond and defraud his brother in any matter: because that the Lord is the avenger of all such, as we also have forewarned you and testified. 4:7 For God hath not called us unto uncleanness, but unto holiness. 4:8 He therefore that despiseth, despiseth not man, but God, who hath also given unto us his holy Spirit.” “Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. 13:5 Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. 13:6 So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.”

Finally, to Overcome all these enemies of marriage you have to make God your anchor. Trust and obey Him. God would never forsake you when you come before Him to ask for strength. “Isaiah 26:4 Trust ye in the LORD for ever: for in the LORD JEHOVAH is everlasting strength”

Paragraph 6: Adventist Home Page 214


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