Stop punishing yourself. Consider it this way: if you’re constantly dwelling on the disapproval of masturbating, you’re still thinking about masturbation all the time. Don’t just trade in your masturbation addiction for another one — they’re so closely related that you won’t resolve anything. Instead, acknowledge that this has been a problem for you, but you will persevere to stop the impulse.
- Remember, you’re human. Humans make mistakes, and they have sexual urges. Neither of these things makes you a bad person. Forgive yourself, and keep in mind that you are more than the sum of your mistakes.
- Resist the urge of sinking into despair by remembering the times spent feeling sorry for yourself when it could have been spent relinquishing your addiction.
Remove anything that tempts your urge to masturbate. Some common enablers include:
- Access to pornographic material: If you have a collection and you’re serious about quitting masturbation, you’ll have to dispose of it. Burn or shred paper, wipe your hard drive, and set up parental controls on your Internet browser that block adult content.
- Certain times of the day: If you have problems before going to bed or in the shower, refrain from any temptation to masturbate. For instance, if it’s a problem late at night, drop to the floor and do push-ups until you’re too exhausted to do anything but fall asleep. If you find shower time too tempting, start using ice cold water only — you won’t want to be in there for long.
- Boredom: If you have so little to do that your mind frequently wanders to sexual thoughts, occupy your schedule. You’ll find it gets easier to avoid masturbation if you’re too busy or tired to spare any energy for distractions.
- Loneliness: If you masturbate frequently because you feel lonely, find ways to limit your solitude. For instance, instead of watching the game at home by yourself, watch it at a sports bar. Even if you’re not hanging out with friends, you will not be alone, ultimately having no time for masturbation.
3. Find another outlet for your time and energy. Fill your life with engaging activities. The excitement of doing something different can help replace the urge to masturbate, and you’ll have a go-to distraction next time you’re tempted. Try some of these options:
- Get creative. The process of turning sexual urges into creative output (called sublimation) is something on which monks and sages have relied upon for centuries. Start writing, learn to play a musical instrument, paint, draw, or do whatever else makes you feel like you’re doing something productive.
- Do sports. It takes discipline and persistence to excel at a sport. Develop an interest like running or swimming, or a group sport like soccer, football, basketball, or tennis.
- Eat healthy. Fruits and vegetables have healthy effects on the body and provide nutrients necessary to increase your energy to be more active throughout the day.
- Find a new hobby, or cultivate a skill. Learning something that takes a while to master can refocus your brain on the delayed gratification of achieving goals instead of the instant gratification of masturbation. Try skills like cooking, woodshop, archery, baking, public speaking, or gardening.
- Volunteer your time. Devote your energy to helping people who’ve been less fortunate than you, such as working at a shelter, tutoring low-income students, cleaning up blighted areas, or raising money for a good cause. You’ll get an altruistic feeling from helping others, and you’ll have less time to stray from your goals.
4. Be persistent and patient. Stopping a masturbation addiction won’t hit you like a lightning bolt. It’s a process that requires commitment, and you might make mistakes or relapse on occasions. The real struggle is persevering, so commit now that you won’t let little mistakes stand in your way.
- Set up a reward system. Bribe yourself to stay on-track with rewards for good behavior. For instance, if you can go two whole weeks without masturbating once, treat yourself to a small indulgence like a new game or an ice cream cone.
Know when to seek help. If you’ve tried everything and just can’t seem to get your addiction under control, it might be time to tell someone else about your problem and ask for assistance. Don’t feel ashamed, and remember that many people have similar problems like an addiction. Seeking help is a brave action, and most people you ask will see it as such.
- Ask your religious leader for guidance. If you belong to a church, consider asking your local clergy for help. Keep three things in mind: First, these people become part of the clergy because they’re dedicated to helping their congregations. Second, they’ve probably already assisted someone with a masturbation addiction before. Lastly, they’re bound by strict confidentiality. Request a private appointment with your pastor, bishop, imam, rabbi, or other religious leader, and see if his or her advice can help you.
- Make an appointment with a medical professional. Counselors, psychologists and psychiatrists are all trained to help people with varying levels of addiction. Start by seeing a therapist in your area, who can assess your addiction and refer you to more specialized help if necessary. Several treatment options are available, from cognitive-behavior therapy to medication.
- If you have a problem in bed, keep mints or candy next to your bed. Sometimes eating a snack or a small piece helps. When your mouth produces more saliva it brings on serotonin, and that brings on a sense of well-being and comfort. You can choose sugar-free so you don’t worry about dental problems.
- Try not to be influenced by friends who masturbate or talk about masturbation.
- Set tiny goals for yourself, start with going 3 days clean, the third day is the speed bump, get past that and you KNOW that you’re committed. Then go a week, then 10 days, then two weeks, then 17 days, etc. Small goals building up to one helps.
- If you have a problem with masturbating in the shower, set a short timer and try getting out before that timer goes off.
- If you’re religious, try praying.
- Spend more time with friends and family.
- Avoid pornographic triggers.
- Consider installing porn-blocking software on your computer. Of course you will know the password to bypass the blocking function, but just having it pop up will remind you of your priorities. You can also type a random password in a text file, copy and paste it when you enter your password and verify it, then delete the text file. Then, you will not be able to know the password of your own porn-blocker. This is the best way to keep you strong and spare you the struggle.
- When you get an urge, think about why you want to stop. You can also think about what your parents would think/say if they walked in on you.
- Don’t visit porn sites as well.
- If you come upon a certain thought, urge, or you lustful thoughts come into your mind, immediately think about something such as baseball, football, etc.
- Avoid sitting on your bed. Use table/chair, and always sit with other people.
- Do excercise daily in evening this will make you tired at night and masturabation is often done at night.When you are you ill give sleep preference not masturbation.
- Do not feel ashame and reduce your valuable time towards other things.
- If you have the tendency to masturbate looking at porn on the computer, try moving your computer into a room where others can see you.
- It’s easier to stop if you are in relationship where your partner can help you in it. For example, spend time watching movie, going for shopping or even going for sports with your partner. This ensures that the urges are no longer there and you will eventually forget about it.
- Don’t look at anything that turns you on.
- Don’t stay at home alone, always hangout with friends or family.
- Think about your family or anyone else and if they were watching you.
- When the urge is very intense take a cold shower! It is not only shown to calm the mind but have many other benefits to overall health and energy.
- When you feel the need to masturbate, take a brisk walk or jog. Always try to occupy yourself when the urge arises.
- Consider the long term effects of your masturbation. If you have ever felt guilty, or depressed or filthy, is it worth your mental health to continue? Occupy your time and keep your mind fixed on your goal. Develop healthy new habits and love the feeling of daily success.
- Cultivate pure thoughts by reading holy books like Bhagavad Gita, Bible, etc; before going to bed.
- One thing that works with the software is having a friend set the password for you, so that you never know what it is. This way, the software will block your computer from being able to access porn, but you will not be able to deactivate it.
- Doing yoga will control your tends to do masturbation and you will get free thoughts on your mind.
- Wear a rubber band on your wrist. If the urge hits you, snap yourself.
- Some video games contain sexual materials, such as sexually attractive characters or sexual activity (kissing, making out or even making love). So if you play video games to distract the need, be careful!
- Remember that members of the clergy and medical professionals are human and susceptible to error, too. If you ask someone for help and he or she suggests a remedy you find highly uncomfortable, seek a second opinion.