The term ‘long term relationship’ has eluded a lot of us. Let us tell you, couples whose relationships withstand the test of time, fights, and much more are not super humans. There are certain key elements in all relationships which need to be looked after and tweaked from time to time. Let’s take a look at those elements.
Element of respect
Personally we believe that ‘respect’ is the single most important element of a relationship. With respect comes admiration, understanding and adaptability. It can be as simple as supporting your partner in a discussion on the dining table. Respect can mean staying away from things that he doesn’t like, not doing things that he does not approve of and much more. Wait, we are not talking about one-sided respect. Expect as much respect as you give!
Element of truth
What does ‘honesty’ mean in a relationship? Just like a high rise needs a strong foundation, a relationship needs a strong base to survive long term. Honesty is the base of any relationship. It drives the feeling of ‘trust’ which can make or break your relationship. Do you believe in white lies? We don’t. If you do, you better know what you are getting into and what your limits are. One lie can lead to another and so on. We’d suggest that you be honest about all the little things – even if it is about forgetting to record his favourite TV show.
Element of planning
Nothing, and we mean nothing survives without good planning. If you are in a relationship that you think can go a long way, start planning. Mind you, it does not need to be rocket science. It can be simple conversations over a coffee or a glass of wine. Questions like “Where do you see yourself 5 years from now” or “What do you see for us in the future” can get the ball rolling. Planning adds stability to a relationship. Who wouldn’t want to work towards taking the relationship forward, if you already have set goals together for both of you?
Element of satisfaction
Have you heard your girlfriends going ‘I am in such a satisfying relationship’? What do you think they mean when they say that? Satisfaction does not mean only sex. You will feel satisfied when your physical and emotional needs are looked after. It is a great feeling, isn’t it? Make a conscious effort to keep your partner satisfied, whether it is his emotional outlet of going blah blah blah after a long day of work or the physical pleasures he craves.
Element of romance
Okay we may sound like a little girl giving stupid relationship advice here but believe us, many of us forget to add ‘spark’ in our lives. We all get into the rut of life and get busy in our own routines and schedules. Wouldn’t you love it if you found a fresh bunch of roses from your partner even if after many years of dating? Yes, those little romantic moments can go a long way in strengthening your relationship. Surprise him by gifting him a nice shirt, breakfast in bed, or even those surprise naughty times after he’s back from work.
Element of communication
Believe me, clear lines of communication with your partner will save your relationship on a rainy day. What do you think happens when you don’t communicate? He will ‘assume’ and so will you. And we all know what happens when we assume – it makes an ASS out of U and Me. If you think there is a communication gap, sit down over a coffee on the couch and discuss you issues out.
Element of patience
Without a doubt, no relationship is perfect. Fights happen, arguments happen, and a lot of other things happen which are no good. How bad does it feel when your partner walks out of the house after an argument? That lonely feeling is heart breaking, isn’t it? Well that’s not the end of the world. Humans are emotional creatures and we all need to give some slack to each other. The secret to a long term relationship is to wait for the good times and cherish them to the fullest. So when the bad times do come, you can be patient and be reminded of the times that lie ahead.
Element of love
No, we are not talking about the love that you have for your partner. This is about loving the relationship that you are in. It is one thing to love a person and it is another to love the time spent in his company. Love your relationship– think of the good it brings to you. Treasure it and fear its absence.
A long term relationship is all about having a lot of fun, sharing a lot of love and adjusting to the needs and happiness of your partner. Look into the elements that we just talked about and see how they affect your relationship.